Discovering a Gift and Accepting It

There are typically three questions that come up in CLC meetings all the time: What are my passions? What are my gifts? And what does the world need from me? This blog post is going to focus on that second question, or an experience I’ve been having moreso of discovering that a gift of mine is actually a gift in itself.

Over the past four years, I’ve developed myself to be a very reach-out person. Part of that is a function of being a huge extrovert (at least according to Myers-Briggs, which scored me a 30/30 on the extrovert scale). But expanding upon that, something that gives me joy and gets me out of bed in the morning is making someone’s day. Making someone feel loved and giving them the reminder that, yes, they have gifts that make them the amazing person they are. I have a coffee cup album going where I get someone else’s name on my coffee cup (think Starbucks typically) and use that as a way to reflect upon how that person has had a positive influence on me. That doubles as an affirmation of that person as well.

During last summer, a couple of very good friends and I were having a discussion in the car on the way back from 10 PM mass in Berkeley. I don’t remember how it got there, but the discussion centered on a birthday celebration for one of them I helped coordinate the previous week. What they both told me was something no one had told me before: they were amazed at how I was able to bring people together. While some of the friends at the celebration were expected, they were really surprised at some of the others I had been able to contact and bring together (with some help from other people obviously). I appreciated the acknowledgement but when at that time, I didn’t really think too much of the ability to bring people together for a common expression of birthday love. There were two experiences within the past year that started showing me how much of a gift that was.

The first occurred at the end of fall quarter. Another really good friend of mine was going to reach the first anniversary of a really important yet emotional day. I had a greater opportunity to bond with that friend during fall quarter. There was one night a few days before where I felt spurred to compile a card together showing how much her friends had known about that day and wanted to express our love and support for her. After a bunch of emails and group texts, I had compiled a whole lot of messages to give to her to open on that important day. That following day she blogged about that outpouring of love and how much it meant to her. Helping to coordinate that had a positive effect on her. It was a way for me to use my gift of bringing people together to make an important day that much more special for her.

 

The second happened just recently actually. A really close friend of mine had her birthday coming up. I decided that leading up to it that my intention for her birthday was to think of a way to bring as many people that she had positively affected together. How to do this: a giant birthday card of course. After a huge mass email, carrying around a seemingly unsuspicious green posterboard, and meeting a bunch of people, a 22 x 28 posterboard was full to the brim with birthday wishes. All that was left to do was to deliver the card, intentionally while my friend was out of the room. She did figure out it was me that helped organize it but to hear that she was grateful for it felt really good. Like my previous friend’s experience, she felt loved and ultimately, that was what I was hoping for.

What I’ve learned from these experiences is that I have a gift for being able to bring people together, even people who don’t necessarily know each other. I don’t say this to brag (because even as I’m writing this I’m a little self-conscious about that) but moreso to recognize this area that I’m strong at and can use to make a difference in people’s lives. Bringing it back, I am really passionate about making sure others feel loved. One way I’ve learned I can do that is bringing the people that also love them together for one big, old expression of love. It’s important for me to think about the time and place about whether something like that is appropriate for certain people at certain times, but acknowledging and taking possession of my “bringing people together” gift is what I’ve slowly begun to do over the past few months. Knowing and accepting that gift, while making sure to be thoughtful and intentional about when to utilize it, can only help amplify its intended effect to help people feel loved.